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Real Estate Broker Calls Indian Village Residents "Self-Absorbed Idiots Without a Pot To Piss In"

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Back in June, we ran a post about a six-bedroom in Indian Village listed for $50 K. While the house was appealing, we found the text the real estate broker added to the listing to be lame, so we had a local resident take a crack at improving it. You might say we did the agent a favor for, you know, trying to make the place sound better. Well that agent was apparently a TOUGH dude named Nick Anderson. His Century 21 bio contains the following text (the ALL CAPS emphasis are copied, not ours):

If you want an agent that is not afraid to ruffle the feathers of the banks and government agencies.....call me, Nick, because IT'S A TOUGH MARKET OUT THERE......AND YOU NEED AN EVEN TOUGHER AGENT ON YOUR SIDE!
Aside from being great at writing his own bio, Nick is really great at writing emails to Curbed when we try and mess with his brilliant listing text. And exceptionally good at winning over the neighbors in the area he is selling in. What follows is an unedited version of Nick's email to us with a few additions of bold text on our part. Thanks, Nick. Pass the Cheetos.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Nick Anderson
Date: Thu, Aug 9, 2012 at 12:30 AM
Subject: re: 6BR home with .....for 50K
To: detroit@curbed.com


I recently came across your website and noticed my listing in Indian Village featured in your 'marketplace' section. after reading your pithy commentary I felt obliged to address your snotty, punk-ass attitude.

First, and foremost, I take umbrage at the fact that you would employ the feeble mind of a "Villages local" to re-write MY listing comments. Having spent some considerable time in that area I can tell you unequivocally that nearly all of those "locals" are self-absorbed idiots without a pot to piss in. I met none who, like me, made a living convincing outsiders to buy into their precious 'hood, yet they were only too quick and happy to offer their unsolicited, and usually erroneous, advice.

I am a multi-million dollar RE producer. I think I have a pretty good handle on how to describe a property. (this one, with its "bad" description had more offers than you can shake a stick at) I have a 100% sell-through for my listings so I think I know how to do this stuff. Your snide, pathetic comment regarding my leasing language indicates that, like the "Villages idiots", you, too, have no clue what it takes to convince buyers to part with their money. Your arrogance in thinking that ..."the place deserved a better" description is simply sheer asshole-ism.

you have a website for which no one holds you accountable. don't presume that imparts upon you any actual knowledge or authority. stay in your mom's basement in your undies; eat your Cheetos; and let the adults make the world go round.

· Six-Bedroom Home With a Carriage House For $50 K [Curbed Detroit]